Better relationships begin with work on yourself

Counselor and Family Therapist, Alicia Falzon, shares her insights in a panel discussion at the 2018 Renaissance of Marriage Conference held in Sydney, Australia.

I was fortunate enough to participate on a dialogue panel at the Renaissance of Marriage conference. Our panel consisted of a selection of delegates with appropriate and diverse expertise. We were invited to dialogue on the challenges and success of working in our particular field.

My point was that although all couples have conflict, disagreement and periods of trials, some couples are not prepared to do the work on self. Work on self begins when each individual is focused on their part in it and not on the emotional process between them.
The challenge is to be more subjective of who we are. The challenge is to use the part of your brain to regulate yourself in a strained situation.

If I can be a little less anxious and not respond to the emotional content in the room then I can be a resource to our relationship that is anxious. When I do this I am able to say what the problem is without the fear of threat.

CAN I OBSERVE IT, CAN I MANAGE IT, AND CAN I DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT?
HOW CAN I DO IT DIFFERENTLY? TO FUNCTION UP SO TO SPEAK.

After hearing all the speakers my overall thoughts were that we need the sacraments, marriage preparation, tools and motivation as well as marriage coaching.

How will we know if we are on right track?

How we will know if we are working towards our goals and making a difference?

Football players, basket ball players and swimmers all have coaches to keep them on track.

SO WHY NOT A MARRIAGE COACH?

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